Today was awesome. I went to the noon class (again no work) and it was packed. The instructor was great and class flew by. I felt good about all my postures and my body felt loose and strong. What was really noticeable was the wonderful energy of the class. Everyone was so excited to be there and everyone was really pushing and giving it their all. It made class so much easier.
After class the studio owner invited people to play in the snow. I had watched them do this once before and passed after I saw a man in his undies do a belly flop in the snow. But today I don't know what came over me. I thought, "why not?" So for about 30 seconds about 7 of us ran into a huge snow bank and flopped around while someone took pictures. It felt good for maybe 3 seconds and after that I was freezing but I loved it. I was flopping around in the snow with total strangers wearing next to nothing. It was so freeing.
I am finding this experience not only benefiting my body and self-image but also somewhat healing. I feel like I am getting back to center. I don't think I have felt such peace since before Lisa died. Everything seems still and I find myself really grateful but in an almost overwhelming way. It is so new I don't really know how to process it yet. It is almost as if through these silly classes I am getting a piece of me back that I thought I would never see again. It is like with each deep, full breath, a little bit of innocence returns.